by Elder Mike Chon

In the last article we asked the question, “who is your family?” We saw that as believers we have a new Father and new brothers and sisters. Even though all of us have a natural family, our spiritual family should and ought to be more of a priority than our natural family. So how important is this family?

In the days of antiquity, the family structure was much different than how our families are shaped today. First of all, members of a family never made decisions to satisfy individual needs. They always sought to do what was best for the family or group. In America today, everything is very individualistic in regards to what type of job or career to follow, where to live, who you are going to marry. In the New Testament times, people worked, lived, and married to benefit the family not just the individual. As well, the closest and most intimate relationships that people had were between siblings, not husband and wife. People did not marry so that they would have their emotional and physical needs fulfilled. They viewed their brother and sister as the closest relationships they have and would speak to them in regards to any personal needs or decisions they may need to make. If we are to consider our church as our family, we should live and make decisions in light of our church being our family. I believe too many times as believers we say that our church is our family, but never truly live out those words in our lives.

If the church is your family, then our decisions in regards to our career, where we live, and even who we marry should be considered in light of our church. Can you just leave your family as easily as so many Americans do a church? How many people do you know that jump from one church to another because they are dissatisfied with something or someone? Would you leave your family because someone is hard to get along with? Would you leave your family because you didn’t like what your father had to say during dinner? Do we only consider ourselves when making a decision in regards to work or where to live even though it will take you away from your church? Is a job or a house more important than your family? Is your church truly your family?

Of course there are legitimate reasons to leave a church. But for most of us we have made decisions that are separate from our church being a family. It is not the decision ultimately that shows your view of the church. It is how you made that decision that ultimately will reveal your view of the church. Is it just some institution that is there to benefit my life, to help me grow, to help me know God better, to help me become a better person, to help me meet more friends? If it is, then your decision to leave the church will be based on your personal preferences and goals. Everything will be centered on yourself. Then the church was and never will be truly a family. For those that are married, if you think that you need to do what is best for “your family” by leaving a church so that you can grow, has never seen the church as a true family. Sadly, most believers will affirm that church is a family, but will never live their lives in that way. That is why it is so easy for people to leave for any reason that may meet their individual needs or for someone to never become a member of a church. These believers are the “only child” in God’s family. They have no siblings and have never learned what it means to be part of a family. In the American church culture, there are thousands of these “only children” filling churches throughout the states and it has become the norm for church in America. But if the church is truly a family, with brothers and sisters that have been adopted into one family through the cross of Christ, if we are God’s household, then as members of that household we should live as one family.

Do you truly consider the church your family? Do you consider the church when you are making decisions in your life or the life of your natural family? Do you seek counsel in regards to your decision-making from an older brother or sister in your church? The church is your family. If you love God as your Father, then you would love the church as your family. You cannot separate those two things. In the next article, we will look at the impact our church can make in this world by the love we have for one another as a family.