We Are Come To The Blood Of Sprinkling…

by Charles Haddon Spurgeon

Hebrews 12:24

Reader, have you come to the blood of sprinkling? The question is not whether you have come to a knowledge of doctrine, or an observance of ceremonies, or to a certain form of experience, but have you come to the blood of Jesus? The blood of Jesus is the life of all vital godliness. If you have truly come to Jesus, we know how you came-the Holy Spirit sweetly brought you there. You came to the blood of sprinkling with no merits of your own. Guilty, lost, and helpless, you came to take that blood, and that blood alone, as your everlasting hope. You came to the cross of Christ, with a trembling and an aching heart; and oh! what a precious sound it was to you to hear the voice of the blood of Jesus! The dropping of His blood is as the music of heaven to the penitent sons of earth. We are full of sin, but the Saviour bids us lift our eyes to Him, and as we gaze upon His streaming wounds, each drop of blood, as it falls, cries, ‘It is finished; I have made an end of sin; I have brought in everlasting righteousness.’

Oh! sweet language of the precious blood of Jesus! If you have come to that blood once, you will come to it constantly. Your life will be ‘Looking unto Jesus.’ Your whole conduct will be epitomized in this-‘To whom coming.’ Not to whom I have come, but to whom I am always coming. If thou hast ever come to the blood of sprinkling, thou wilt feel thy need of coming to it every day. He who does not desire to wash in it every day, has never washed in it at all. The believer ever feels it to be his joy and privilege that there is still a fountain opened. Past experiences are doubtful food for Christians; a present coming to Christ alone can give us joy and comfort. This morning let us sprinkle our door-post fresh with blood, and then feast upon the Lamb, assured that the destroying angel must pass us by.

4.17a

Weekly Links (11/7/2014)

“Thousands of humans have been brought to think that humility means pretty women trying to believe they are ugly and clever men trying to believe they are fools…God wants to bring the man to a state of mind in which he could design the best cathedral in the world, and know it to be the best, and rejoice in the fact, without being any more (or less) or otherwise glad at having done it than he would be if it had been done by another. God wants him, in the end, to be so free from any bias in his own favor that he can rejoice in his own talents as frankly and gratefully as in his neighbor’s talents—or in a sunrise, an elephant, or a waterfall. He wants each man, in the long run, to be able to recognize all creatures (even himself) as glorious and excellent things. He wants to kill their animal self-love as soon as possible; but it is His long-term policy, I fear, to restore to them a new kind of self-love—a charity and gratitude for all selves, including their own.” (C. S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters)

by Stephen Rodgers

Alright…time for some more free resources!

And that’s it!

Pro Rege

Age of Opportunity: Chapter 4 – Moment-by-Moment Pursuit of God

by Josh Liu

O LORD, you have searched me and known me!
You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from afar.
You search out my path and my lying down
and are acquainted with all my ways. (Psalm 139:1-3)

It is an amazing truth that we may be known by God. That is, God is personally active in the life of a person and intimately relates to His elect children. Yet how often is it the case that we forget God. On a scale of 1-10 (1 being nonexistent, 10 being constant), how would you evaluate your consciousness of God throughout your day, from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep? You are never at a moment where you can be truly self-sufficient or independent of God; to seek independence from God is sin. Adam and Eve incurred the curses of God by rejecting dependence on God’s words (Gen. 3:1-19); sinners under the wrath of God, refusing to honor God as God or give thanks to Him, are abandoned to their wickedness and depravity (Rom. 1:18-32). God ought to so saturate your life that to “remove” God from your life would leave nothing behind.

This is the theme of chapter four, “What Is a Family? A Job Description,” in Paul David Tripp’s Age of Opportunity. The present article seeks to summarize this chapter. This book is one resource the youth staff has been reviewing to complement our study on biblical parenting. The youth ministry seeks to partner with parents in the discipleship of their (youth-age) children, which requires understanding what God requires of parents revealed in His Word. In chapter three, Tripp proposed that the family is God’s primary learning community, with parents as the primary educators (Tripp, 41). He goes on in chapter four to describe principles that guide parents in teaching “God’s truth in everyday life” (p. 53). He identifies three foundational themes to every human situation for parents to remember: 1) family is a theological community, 2) family is a sociological community, 3) family is a redemptive community.

Family Is a Theological Community

Tripp posits that “the ultimate fact of family life is the fact that God exists and that we are his creatures” (Tripp, 54). Thus, the parents’ goal is to “root our children’s identity in the existence and glory of God” (Tripp, 54). Life finds true meaning in God.

Why think, work, obey, love, study, discuss, serve, or give? Why? Why? All of life blows into a chaotic mass of meaningless choices unless it is rooted in the one fact that makes every other fact make sense–GOD. (Tripp. 55)

This teaching by parents of a moment-by-moment consciousness of God is founded on Deuteronomy 6:20-25. To do this, parents should remember:

  1. That every moment is God’s moment. “There is never a moment where God is absent, or inactive” (Tripp, 56). Teens (or sinners in general) do not naturally live in God’s moment, but rather are wholly self-focused, focused on the horizontal and present.
  2. There is always a higher agenda. The greater purpose of every situation of life is God’s purpose, not personal desires or happiness.
  3. Their (the teens’) story in God’s story. The Bible has often been mishandled as some sort of glorified encyclopedia with verses organized topically. Scripture is the unified revelation of God’s story in redeeming His people. To teach God’s truth to children “means that every day, in every way possible, to embed the story of your teenager in the larger story of God” (Tripp, 59).
  4. To exhort their children to trust and obey God. People tend “to do things that are God’s job and they forget to do the things that he has called them to do” (Tripp, 61).

Family Is a Sociological Community

Family involves relationships, which will provide opportunities for conflict and sin (cf. James 4:1-2). Thus, Tripp writes,

The family will teach and model what it means to love your neighbor as yourself or it will violate that standard at every point and teach a self-centered individualism. Powerful messages about the nature of relationships will be taught in they way Mom and Dad talk to one another, serve one another, make decisions, and deal with their differences. It is impossible for a family to escape teaching and modeling some functional philosophy of relationship for its children. (Tripp, 63)

For example, you have heard of stories of siblings in a heated argument. In the midst of the yelling, the sister picks up a phone call from a friend and her tone and demeanor completely transforms to a sweet gentle voice. “The family is the context where the teenager’s true heart toward relationships is consistently exposed” (Tripp, 65).

Family Is a Redemptive Community

Finally, Tripp describes the family as the context of in-depth, constant modeling of the gospel. “Because of sin, the family is a place of unfulfilled promises, broken dreams, and disappointed expectations” (Tripp, 65). The revealing of sin opens opportunities for revealing the need of Christ. Tripp encourages parents to model the gospel by confessing their own specific sins and failures to their children, and communicating their own need of Christ. Tripp shares a powerful experience with his daughter who, one night, broke down before him, telling him that she

“can’t do it, I can’t do what you are asking me. It’s just impossible…When you tell me to give [my brothers] something of mine, I do, but I hate it and I am mad at you for asking me and mad at them for taking it! I don’t want to share, I hate it! It’s impossible to enjoy!…She began to realize that in her own strength, by the exercise of her own will, she could not obey God. In her room that night, she began to cry out for Christ. (Tripp, 67)

Parents need to remember that empowering work of God in those who put their faith in Him (cf. 2 Cor. 12:9; Phil. 4:13). Tripp also encourages parents to not distance themselves from their children’s sins and failures, but to identify with them (Tripp, 69). He reminds parents that they cannot shelter their children from this fallen world, but to redeem it by bringing in the gospel.

The parent can teach God’s truth everyday, in the mundane moments of life, by remembering that the family is a theological, sociological, and redemptive community. Ultimately to remember God and point their children to God in every moment. The parents’ job is not to raise “successful,” wealthy, well-liked, independent children. Rather, their job is to glorify God by bringing their children up in the instruction of the Lord. These are helpful reminders and principles as Lumos youth ministry seeks to support families through the ministry of prayer and God’s Word.

To encourage you to pursue moment-by-moment God awareness, consider the following reflections:

  1. When you worry about food or clothing, remember God’s gracious provisions (cf. Matt. 6:25).
  2. When you see a bird, may you be reminded of God’s sovereignty and care for you (cf. Matt. 6:26).
  3. When you’re stuck in line or in traffic, or are running late, remember God’s plans (cf. Prov. 16:9; James 4:13-15).
  4. When you have to work, remember God’s joy in faithfulness (cf. Matt. 25:21b; Eph. 6:5).
  5. When you suffer, remember the privilege of sharing in Christ’s sufferings (cf. Phil. 1:29; 1 Peter 4:13)
  6. When you see the stars, remember God’s omnipotence and omniscience over creation (cf. Ps. 147:4).
  7. When you experience illness, remember God’s strength and promise of eternal glory (cf. 2 Cor. 12:9; Rev. 21:4).
  8. When you handle money or valuables, may you remember the surpassing treasure of Christ who ransomed you with His precious blood (cf. Phil. 3:8; 1 Peter 1:18-19).
  9. When you wake up in the morning or age, remember God’s grace of life, mercies, and coming judgment (cf. Lam. 3:22-24; Ecc. 11:9).

The list goes on. May Scripture–God–saturate your every moment.

And His Hands Were Steady Until The Going Down Of The Sun

by Charles Haddon Spurgeon

Exodus 17:12

So mighty was the prayer of Moses, that all depended upon it. The petitions of Moses discomfited the enemy more than the fighting of Joshua. Yet both were needed. No, in the soul’s conflict, force and fervour, decision and devotion, valour and vehemence, must join their forces, and all will be well. You must wrestle with your sin, but the major part of the wrestling must be done alone in private with God. Prayer, like Moses’, holds up the token of the covenant before the Lord. The rod was the emblem of God’s working with Moses, the symbol of God’s government in Israel. Learn, O pleading saint, to hold up the promise and the oath of God before Him. The Lord cannot deny His own declarations. Hold up the rod of promise, and have what you will.

Moses grew weary, and then his friends assisted him. When at any time your prayer flags, let faith support one hand, and let holy hope uplift the other, and prayer seating itself upon the stone of Israel, the rock of our salvation, will persevere and prevail. Beware of faintness in devotion; if Moses felt it, who can escape? It is far easier to fight with sin in public, than to pray against it in private. It is remarked that Joshua never grew weary in the fighting, but Moses did grow weary in the praying; the more spiritual an exercise, the more difficult it is for flesh and blood to maintain it. Let us cry, then, for special strength, and may the Spirit of God, who helpeth our infirmities, as He allowed help to Moses, enable us like him to continue with our hands steady ‘until the going down of the sun;’ till the evening of life is over; till we shall come to the rising of a better sun in the land where prayer is swallowed up in praise.

4.16p

Weekly Links (10/31/2014)

“An unforgiving heart is an unforgiven heart.” (Tim Keller)

by Cesar Vigil-Ruiz

Feliz Reformation Day! In light of our celebration long ago for what God has done through the faithfulness of many men, we will highlight some that have led us to where the church is today. So let’s get to it!

  • Ligonier Ministries is known for their strong emphasis on Reformed Theology, and their affirmation of the Reformation. So, in light of that, instead of their usual $5 Friday sale, they are making some of their Reformation resources available for free, including a teaching series (Luther and the Reformation and Reformation Profiles), eBooks (books on John Calvin and Martin Luther), and an audiobook of R.C. Sproul’s Are We Together? A Protestant Analyzes Roman Catholicism (great resource for knowing the differences between what Rome teaches and what Scripture teaches). DO NOT miss out on this great deal, which is free!
  • Pastor Voddie Baucham addresses the argument that the issue of same-sex marriage is the civil rights issue of the day, much like racism against African-Americans a generation ago was the issue then. He gives two talks that answer this and other common objections against the biblical position of marriage consisting of a man and a woman.
  • How do you bless the socks off your pastor? Stephen Altrogge’s answers are as good as, if not better than, the actual question itself. Read and make sure our pastor’s socks come flying off!
  • Our past retreat, which can be accessed (video or audio), dealt with the issue of suffering and God’s glory. For the blessing and growth of our church, we received both Dr. Greg Harris’ book and study guide. For those who are more audio-inclined, Dr. Harris has read his entire book in audio format. Listen, and give thanks to our God for what He has done in Dr. Harris’ life!
  • In honor of Reformation Day (take a back seat, Halloween!), Steve Lawson writes a profile of the leading theologian of the Reformation, John Calvin. Make sure you read the background of the events leading up to the Reformation, and the other theologians who took part in this amazing outbreak of biblical preaching. Even Pastor Jim Kang from LBC East Bay gets into it with an article that gets even deeper on Martin Luther’s life. Enjoy!
  • With all the reasons one can give to joining a church, here’s an article giving some of the bad reasons people give in joining a church, and how to respond with wise counsel.
  • Ligonier Ministries has just come out with their results of a survey to Americans about different theological statements, and it seems worrisome, yet at the same time, very promising. Here’s Pastor David Murray’s summary and notes.
  • Seeing that two big conferences from CCEF and ACBC took place in Southern CA recently, Pastor and biblical counselor Jim Newheiser has written a look at the highs that took place there, and the return to daily ministry that he calls, “Down from the Mountaintop on Monday.”
  • What is the proper criteria for voting? Mark Snoeberger has some biblical wisdom to impart in this area.
  • What happens when evil triumphs over good? Professor Robert Gagnon has written a mini-post summarizing the state of the church with regards to the issue of same-sex marriage in answer to the question. This may be the best post I have read thus far on the subject. Gagnon later interacts with author Matthew Vines, who is leading the way for the church to embrace and affirm same-sex marriage.

That’s all for this week! Looking forward to spending this weekend focusing on Christ and His true character!

Soli Deo Gloria

Getting to Know Pastor Mark

by Pastor Patrick Cho

Last month, Lighthouse Bible Church San Jose installed Mark Chin as their new senior pastor. We were super excited to celebrate together that momentous occasion for their church family. Mark, Julie, and their two boys, Athan and Joshua, have been getting acclimated to their new city and surroundings, so I thought this would be a good occasion for us to get to know Mark and his family a little better as well.

Tell me a little bit about your family.

Julie was born at the KP [Kaiser Permanente] in West LA where I worked as a per diem physician throughout seminary and recently. She’s a Korean American gal who grew up in Cerritos and went to UCI. She was a 5th grade school teacher. She loves music and loves to sing. Athan Jeremiah was named after Athanasius, the Bishop of Alexandria and the prophet Jeremiah. Athan’s the performer and party person in the family. Joshua Cephas was named after . . . well, kind of obvious right. He’s the stealth bomber in the Chin family.

Stealth bomber?

He’s quiet, flies under the radar, but delivers a major impact.

How did you and Julie first meet?

A friend tried to set me up with one of Julie’s best friends. [Note: You’ll have to talk to Mark and Julie to get the rest of that story.]

How and when did you become a Christian?

My mom laid the foundation by reading us (my brother and me) Bible stories every night from a children’s Bible and singing Gospel songs with us. Some of my earliest and best memories are hanging out with my brother on my parents’ bed while my mom played, sang, and read Bible stories to us. This went a long way to establish a simple understanding of who God is, who Jesus Christ is, and what sin is. The need for a saving relationship with Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of sins was pressed upon me at the Christian elementary school I went to in Toronto. Then one evening, I was compelled to get out of bed and approach my mom to ask what I needed to do to be saved and have a relationship with Jesus Christ. My mom shepherded me along the path of pursuing forgiveness for my sins from our Lord and Savior and of surrendering my life to His will and His Word.

Where did you study?

I studied at a variety of different places. I did my undergraduate at the University of Western Ontario in Canada. I did my MD at the University of Ottawa Canada. I did my family practice residency at the University of Toronto in Canada. I did my seminary training at The Master’s Seminary in Sun Valley, CA.

When did you know you wanted to become a pastor?

I suspect there were inklings part way through medical school while reading through the Sermon on the Mount in my dorm room.

Can you tell us a little bit about the rest of your family?

My grandfather emigrated from the south of China to Toronto, Canada in the early 1900’s. We suspect he was cheap labor for some aspect of the CP rail projects and then later established himself in the stereotypical Chinese laundry business. He then brought my father out of China in the 50’s when the Communist Party took over China. My dad was among the earliest Asian civil/structural engineers in Canada. My mom, half-English and half-Chinese, was adopted by a Christian family who were very British. She was a public health nurse. So my brother and I grew up in a very mixed cultural home, with a heavy emphasis on church, which became our primary community growing up.

What is your favorite food?

Ice cream. Chocolate.

What is your favorite pastime or hobby?

Reading – go figure. I used to love boogie boarding and skiing – but getting to surf and snow is a little more challenging these days.

Is there any passage of Scripture that has stayed with you or has been particularly helpful to you over the years?

The Sermon on the Mount still crushes me. John 15, 1 Peter, and the book of Jeremiah are very special to me.

Who have been some of the most influential people in your life?

My family, my buddy Ben Dosti, a Christian med school prof, Wayne Mack, John MacArthur, and Jim Pile and John Street – two pastors I served under at Grace Community Church.

What are some things you would like to accomplish before you die?

How long have I got? I just want to finish well – as a faithful servant of Christ, a faithful husband and father. I would love to preach/teach through most of the Bible.

How do you feel about joining the Lighthouse Bible Church family?

Thrilled to be part of a church that is so anchored to Christ and committed to living His Word in every aspect of its ministry!

The Precious Blood Of Christ

by Charles Haddon Spurgeon

From 1 Peter 1:19

Standing at the foot of the cross, we see hands, and feet, and side, all distilling crimson streams of precious blood.

  • It is ‘precious’ because of its redeeming and atoning efficacy. By it the sins of Christ’s people are atoned for; they are redeemed from under the law; they are reconciled to God, made one with Him.
  • Christ’s blood is also ‘precious’ in its cleansing power; it ‘cleanseth from all sin.’ ‘Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow.’ Through Jesus’ blood there is not a spot left upon any believer, no wrinkle nor any such thing remains. O precious blood, which makes us clean, removing the stains of abundant iniquity, and permitting us to stand accepted in the Beloved, notwithstanding the many ways in which we have rebelled against our God.
  • The blood of Christ is likewise ‘precious’ in its preserving power. We are safe from the destroying angel under the sprinkled blood. Remember it is God’s seeing the blood which is the true reason for our being spared. Here is comfort for us when the eye of faith is dim, for God’s eye is still the same.
  • The blood of Christ is ‘precious’ also in its sanctifying influence. The same blood which justifies by taking away sin, does in its after-action, quicken the new nature and lead it onward to subdue sin and to follow out the commands of God. There is no motive for holiness so great as that which streams from the veins of Jesus.
  • And ‘precious,’ unspeakably precious, is this blood, because it has an overcoming power. It is written, ‘They overcame through the blood of the Lamb.’ How could they do otherwise? He who fights with the precious blood of Jesus, fights with a weapon which cannot know defeat.

The blood of Jesus! sin dies at its presence, death ceases to be death: heaven’s gates are opened. The blood of Jesus! we shall march on, conquering and to conquer, so long as we can trust its power!

4.16a

Weekly Links (10/24/2014)

If we feel discomfort at some of the Bible’s teaching, is it really because the Bible is a product of its time, or because we are? (Barry Cooper, Can I really trust the Bible?: and other questions about Scripture, truth and how God speaks)

by Cesar Vigil-Ruiz

Feliz Friday! What better way to start off your weekend than with this week’s links? Here they are!

  • In anticipation for the release of two new books on a biblical view and methodology of counseling (Gospel-Centered Counseling and Scripture and Counseling), Al Mohler provides the foreword for Scripture and Counseling: God’s Word for Life in a Broken World, the second book of a new collaboration of pastors and counselors, edited by Robert Kellemen. Mohler’s thoughts basically sums up the current state of Christian counseling, and I would commend it to you (as well as the books!).
  • Peter Enns was a former Old Testament professor at Westminster Theological Seminary, but has since rejected evangelical belief in the inerrancy of Scripture, and has recently come out with a book critiquing the inerrancy of Scripture, primarily in the Old Testament. Parroting many of the common criticisms of the Bible, Enns yet still affirms the Bible as the Word of God. Professor Michael Kruger has written a very measured and pointed critique to Enns’ work, that will be of help to the church at large in responding to the types of criticisms you hear amongst many non-Christians. Take up and read.
  • Last week, I quoted from an article, “Caring for the Distressed” by Craig Marshall. Now you can read it in their online newsletter, along with other things happening at the Institute of Biblical Counseling & Discipleship, which is located in Escondido!
  • Here’s a helpful resource for collegians who encounter this objection when sharing their faith: Evil and Theodicy by Cornelius Van Til is now available in ePub, Mobi, and PDF. Fresh off the (digital) press!
  • Ed Stetzer has written a couple of posts showing the problem of biblical illiteracy in the church, and possible solutions to remedy that. Mark Jones has a post on the Reformation21 blog that addresses the same issue, but calls it Bible ignorance, instead.
  • Recently, two ordained ministers (a husband and wife) were told by city officials that to not officiate a same-sex wedding could lead to jail time along with an unending fine, until they do so. Ryan Anderson provides context and some strategies for how to respond.
  • Joe Carter continues his series of articles on argument, persuasion and rhetoric for Christians with a post on how to and how not to argue the slippery slope.
  • Dan Phillips has given a clear example of Strange Fire occurring in the ‘ministry’ of Pat Robertson, and explains the main problem with his influence: rejection of the sufficiency of Scripture. A sobering reminder that we need to trust in the Scriptures, and not man, for growth in godliness.
  • Going from observer to lover of the church involves a number of steps, one of which includes a mind shift from seeing what the church can provide for you to what you can provide to the church. This was recently highlighted in Katie Van Dyke’s post, “How I Learned to Love the Church”, who provides a quick layout of how believers have been influenced by the culture to make decisions from a me-centered perspective, and how to turn to an others-centered perspective. Probably my favorite post this week.
  • Matt Perman has a wonderful post on the proper emphasis of accountability in Scripture: the leaders being held accountable to those they are leading. Don’t miss this one.

That’s all for this week! We hope this weekend will be a blessing to all who are able to attend All-Church Retreat! Pray for Greg and Betsy Harris for their travel to Pine Valley, and for those who are staying for church this Sunday, that God will continue to minister His Word to your life, and draw you closer to Him.

Soli Deo Gloria

Marriage Check Up: Session 1

by Pastor Patrick Cho & John Mark Wendler

For Grace Life this year, we are going through a helpful study to evaluate our marriages to see what areas are in need of some fine tuning (. . . or major overhaul!). In order to facilitate this discussion, we are walking through Wayne Mack’s book, Preparing for Marriage God’s Way. This is the book we normally use in our premarital counseling, but I have found it to be helpful as a tool to check up on marriages as well, post-wedding. For each session, both husband and wife are asked to do the homework independent of their spouse. They are then to get together to talk through their answers as a couple. (Since the book is intended to be a premarital counseling help, obviously, some of the questions need to be reinterpreted to fit a post-wedding relationship.) All the couples get together, then, at Grace Life to walk through the lesson together.

Each week, I am also asking one of our Grace Life members to write a brief response to the lesson. This week, John Mark Wendler offered his thoughts:

What was the title/topic of this week’s Grace Life discussion?

The first session of our study covered the basis for a successful marriage.

What were some of the highlights from the study or a general overview of what the study covered?

It is always helpful to hear from a group of people who have thoughtfully answered questions like, “What thoughts does the word marriage bring to you?” and “What are biblical reasons for marriage?” A highlight of tonight’s session was having to think critically about what my thinking on marriage is affected by, and if I am looking to God’s wisdom in Scripture for help in my own marriage.

What were some of the primary or significant Bible passages from the study?

  • 1 Corinthians 8:9-13 was brought up in relation to public displays of affection.
  • Ephesians 5:25 talking about the sacrificial love that Christ has for the church, so much so that he gave himself up, and how we in the same way are to love our wives.
  • Genesis 1-2 speaking to the foundations for marriage.
  • Philippians 2:3-4 talking about considering others as more important than yourself. Again instruction that holds a very high place in a successful marriage.

What lessons did you find particularly challenging from the study? Why?

Instruction was given to avoid giving advice to others exclusively or solely from my own experience with dating. This is always a helpful reminder to me, as personal experience is something easily shared, I understand that even anything I’ve done that might be considered wise, pales in comparison to the wisdom of God, found in the Bible. Psalm 25:5 says, “Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long.”

Were there any helpful responses from the group discussion that you did not originally consider? What were they? Why were they helpful?

It was helpful when one of the members took the 30,000 foot view of dating in the context of our discussion about giving advice to individuals who are dating or who want to date. This helped me, knowing that the guidance we are given in Scripture is applicable across cultures and time periods. By focusing on the, why, of what we do, particularly in the big areas of life, like choosing someone to spend the rest of your life with, it helps to focus on what that means for my own future, as I strive to serve my spouse for the glory of God. Knowing that the specifics can be arbitrary, the ultimate focus must be on pleasing our Lord and Savior.