Monthly Archives: May 2010

Living Theology #23 – The Person of Christ

by Garrett Glende

On the heels of probably the most difficult article I’ve written to date, comes this one – probably the most important. There is no more central theme to Christianity that the person and work of Jesus Christ. He is the main character of the story of Scripture and all of redemptive history is focused on Him. There has never been a more influential or controversial man to have ever walked the earth. I could go on and on with the sweeping praises of His worth simply as an object of study, but what is far more valuable to us is to actually know Him for who He truly is. What we believe about Jesus is foundational to our salvation and is what separates Christianity from all the other religions of the world.

Jesus as Human

In order to fully comprehend who Christ is, we must see both His humanity and deity in equal light. It is clear throughout Scripture that Jesus was not only in the form of a man, but that He had a complete human nature as well. As early as Genesis 3:15 we see that the promised Messiah would come from the seed of Eve, being fulfilled in the virgin birth. Jesus also experienced all the same things that any other human would feel. He was hungry (Matt 4:2), thirsty (John 19:28), tired (John 4:6), and felt pain. He expressed sorrow (John 11:35), agony (Matt 26:38), and wonder (Matt 8:10). He was even tempted in every way, yet was without sin.

The importance of Christ’s humanity cannot be understated. In order to obtain salvation for man, Jesus had to be their representative. It was Jesus’ humanity that enabled His sacrifice to be applied to us. As sinners, we needed someone to represent us before God and Jesus does that. In this way, He is the mediator between God and man, as 1 Timothy 2:5 says that “there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.” Even more, Christ acts as our faithful high priest according to Hebrews 2:17: “Therefore he had to be made like his brothers in every respect, so that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in the service of God, to make propitiation for the sins of the people.” Had Jesus not been man, He would not have been able to satisfy the wrath of God against the sins of men. To put it simply: there is no salvation without the humanity of Christ.

Jesus as God

This is the point where Christianity stands out above all other religions. Most will admit that Jesus was a man who lived on earth and had good teachings. Many even go as far as to call Him a prophet, yet they are unwilling to submit to the clear teachings of Jesus himself about His deity. If I were to list all of the arguments for the deity of Christ, this article would be far too long. Needless to say, since the message of Christianity hinges on the deity of Christ, then the Bible better be fairly clear on this front. The gospel of John opens with the words, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” Verse 14 of the same chapter tells us that this eternal logos “became flesh and dwelt among us,” clearly revealing that the logos in John 1:1 is none other than the Lord Jesus Christ. He is the one who explains the Father. In fact, Jesus says that “whoever has seen me has seen the Father” (John 14:9). We must also be aware that Jesus is not only partly God and partly man. Paul tells us that “in him the whole fullness of deity dwells bodily” (Col 2:9) and we read in Hebrews that “He is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of his nature” (Heb 1:3).

The significance of Christ’s deity cannot be understated. What happens to the cross if Jesus is not God? It becomes just like any other death. Thousands of men were crucified before Jesus was, all of them providing nothing of worth for our souls’ benefit. But because Jesus is God, His death means something. No human being could ever provide salvation for another, for “salvation is from the Lord” (Jonah 2:9). Again, the fact that Jesus is God allows Him to mediate between God and men. He is the one who represents God to us and us to God.

Application

One of the many applications of this great doctrine is the fact that Jesus’ humanity provides us with an example of how we are to live today. If we strive to emulate Christ in all our actions, we can be sure that our lives will be honoring to God. Because He lived a sinless life, there is no part of Christ’s ministry that we are to exclude when we follow after Him as disciples. This is not to say that all of Jesus’ actions were to be prescriptive, in that we would now need to do the exact same deeds as He did (for we are not to literally take up our crosses for the sins of the world), but rather His life shows us a pattern of living that is not to be ignored. He lived as a humble servant, even though He was the Lord of all creation. He fed the hungry and helped the weak. He confronted the false teachers of the day and invested His own life into those that would lead the next generation. All these qualities are certainly to be implemented in our own lives as we submit to His lordship and follow in His footsteps. May we always be thankful for this doctrine of Christ as both fully man and fully God, for there is no gospel without it.

Star Trek and the Local Church (part 2)

by Elder Peter Lim

When I wrote part 1 last month, I wasn’t able to get everything I wanted to say in it. Please refer to it before reading this article to get a better idea of what I’m talking about, especially about what Star Trek has to do with anything.

How the leadership structure of a church ought to be organized has been the topic of debates for a long time, probably since the Apostles were still around. I am generalizing here but Congregationalists tend to vote on everything, Baptists tend to have a head pastor who controls everything, and the Presbyterians tend to treat pastors as employees while the non-pastoral elders control everything. Please do not misunderstand my intentions here. I am not necessarily against denominations. There are many advantages to being in a denomination. There are various reasons for all this diversity of course and there are Biblical merits to each of these denominational polities. But therein lies a subtle problem: it is easy for the structure of the polity to dictate how issues get resolved, rather than Biblical principles. It is very easy to sidestep the priority of a plurality of elders, self-humility, and prayer for the tempting alternative of efficient decision-making, clarity of authority, and pragmatic solutions.

Some people hear of elders Retreats and our long meetings and think to themselves that the elders must be such close friends since we spend a lot of time together. It is true that we are friends, but perhaps not in the way many might think. Being partners in ministry at an elder level is a much higher level of friendship than mere friends in a worldly sense. (More on this in a future article) In some ways I think that the elders of LBC would be even closer friends if we didn’t have to deal with difficult issues that must be resolved. Battle scars result from having to discuss through difficult issues, especially when elders have differing views. Most people have the luxury of not having to deal with resolving differences of preference with their friends. To illustrate, let’s use the example of choosing a carpet color for the church. Most people don’t have to make decisions like these. They have the luxury of just living with whatever decision that has been made, and then criticizing whether they like it or not. The elders have the responsibility to make a decision on this, whether that entails making the decision themselves or appointing some committee to decide for them. If more than one elder has a strong preference on the choice, things get complicated very quickly. There is no written rule how to come to a decision when it’s a non-doctrinal issue. If the elders take a vote, there will always be losers. That can create bitterness. You may have heard that we only operate on elder unanimity here at LBC. That unanimity is not always accomplished very easily. There is much discussion and giving preference to one another. At the end of the day, there will be decisions made in elders meetings which don’t satisfy all the elders, guaranteed. It can often get to a point where an elder actually disagrees strongly with his fellow elders. How can that elder now support his fellow elders, especially in the eyes of the rest of the church? Only by humility and by the love of Christ. That disagreeing elder can show support for his fellow elders and even defend them because he loves them. Steve Preslar talks about his friend who says “Don’t confuse my meekness for weakness.” Similarly I’d like to say, “Don’t confuse the elders’ harmony with being mindless yes-men.” Mine doesn’t rhyme as well. Okay, mine doesn’t rhyme at all.

It would be foolish for a church member to lump all the elders together in one pot as if we all think the same way in every decision. We are not Borg. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, I feel sorry for you…go watch Star Trek: First Contact) Unfortunately, some in the congregation actually hurt the church by trying to dig up dirt between elders. They may even gossip that elder A disagrees with elder B and that elder C isn’t happy about a decision that has been made. All of these things may even be true, but that is never the point. One should never say things like, “I agree with YOU, but that other elder is messed up.” It’s like when a kid asks his mom if he can play his Game Boy and upon hearing “no” he goes and asks his dad instead. Because of a selfish desire to get the answer he wants, he risks ill feelings between his parents. In the same way, no church member should tolerate that sort of comment from another fellow church member regarding anyone in the church, especially the leaders. Instead they ought to obey their leaders and submit to them and let the leaders lead with joy. (Heb. 13:17) Note that this is a Biblical command. How are you doing in it?

It may sound to some people that my last two articles here on the Beacon is a result of many frustrating disagreements that I have personally experienced with the elders of LBC. Let me put that gossip fodder to rest and emphasize that we have had many more agreements than disagreements. I’m happy to say that I have seen our elder board step up in many encouraging ways, far above I even expected. We have had more than our share of difficult circumstances to navigate through and many occasions where it would’ve been simpler to just quit. Much larger churches have told us that we are dealing with difficult and unusual problems that they’ve never had to go through. But God has blessed our church to this point where instead of a church split, we are purposefully planting a new church. What a blessed church we are, to be able to be used by God in multiple places. He has brought our church to the strongest we’ve ever been in the 11 year history of our church. More people have come to trust Him as Lord and Savior in the last few years than all the previous years combined. Friends, we are living in the “good old days” we’re going to be talking about in 10-20-30+ years. Praise Him!

p.s. For the record, it took LBC elders all of 10 seconds to agree on our carpet color choice out of the choices given to us by our landlord…and yes, there was more than one choice. 😉


Weekly Links (5/17/2010) (Monday Edition)

by Stephen Rodgers

“What? Weekly Links on a Monday?!” I know, it’s a shocker. An unexpected gift. Like Christmas in May, but without the months of annoying department-store music leading up to it. But here’s a few articles and videos we weren’t able to squeeze in the past few weeks that you don’t want to miss:

  • First of all, if you missed any of the interview with Michael Horton, you can catch all the parts here. I hope you all enjoyed that as much as I did. (VIDEO)
  • For anyone involved in the operations of the church, you might find the Security at Church blog interesting. Not everything is relevant to everyone, but there are some real insights into some areas that we could benefit from by thinking about a bit more. (BLOG)
  • Over at the DG Blog, they have a great post up on the nuances of the road to Emmaus account in Luke 24:13-35. It’s entitled “The Eyes Jesus Opened First” and I think you’d really like it. (Yes…you!) (WEB)
  • Over at the Aristophrenium, Adam tackles some common misinterpretations and confusion surrounding the often-quoted statement that “God is Love.” (WEB)
  • And I saved this for last, because it is AWESOME. This is four and a half minutes of a fellow named Tony Carter. “Who’s Tony Carter?” you ask. Apparently he’s a pastor who is quite Gospel-centered in his preaching, AND illustrates his sermons with every book or play I had to read back in AP English. As someone with a degree in Literature, I am freaking out with joy. Check out “Every Time: Grace Wins” and then join me in searching out anything else he’s ever preached. (VIDEO)

Pro Rege

Grow in Grace…

by Charles Haddon Spurgeon

From 2 Peter 3:18

‘Grow in grace’-not in one grace only, but in all grace. Grow in that root-grace, faith. Believe the promises more firmly than you have done. Let faith increase in fulness, constancy, simplicity. Grow also in love. Ask that your love may become extended, more intense, more practical, influencing every thought, word, and deed. Grow likewise in humility. Seek to lie very low, and know more of your own nothingness. As you grow downward in humility, seek also to grow upward-having nearer approaches to God in prayer and more intimate fellowship with Jesus. May God the Holy Spirit enable you to ‘grow in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour.’

He who grows not in the knowledge of Jesus, refuses to be blessed. To know Him is ‘life eternal,’ and to advance in the knowledge of Him is to increase in happiness. He who does not long to know more of Christ, knows nothing of Him yet. Whoever hath sipped this wine will thirst for more, for although Christ doth satisfy, yet it is such a satisfaction, that the appetite is not cloyed, but whetted. If you know the love of Jesus-as the hart panteth for the water-brooks, so will you pant after deeper draughts of His love. If you do not desire to know Him better, then you love Him not, for love always cries, ‘Nearer, nearer.’ Absence from Christ is hell; but the presence of Jesus is heaven.

Rest not then content without an increasing acquaintance with Jesus. Seek to know more of Him in His divine nature, in His human relationship, in His finished work, in His death, in His resurrection, in His present glorious intercession, and in His future royal advent. Abide hard by the Cross, and search the mystery of His wounds. An increase of love to Jesus, and a more perfect apprehension of His love to us is one of the best tests of growth in grace.

1.4a

Weekly Links (5/14/2010)

by Stephen Rodgers

Welcome back! So let’s try something different this week. I have a few very-short-yet-thought-provoking devotional-esque posts for you this week. Each of these will probably take you less than a minute, and you’ll get a LOT more than a minute’s worth of thought out of them:

  1. Joshua Harris starts us off with a post regarding the dangers of sin entitled “I Will Shake Myself Free.”
  2. Tia Han has an excellent thought on walking in obedience.
  3. Jared Wilson borrows from Anthony Carter who probably borrowed from Robert Louis Stevenson with a brief tale entitled “I Have Seen the Face of the Pilot, and He Smiled.”
  4. Douglas Wilson comments on the ridiculousness of envying sin in his post “A Can Opener for the Peaches.”
  5. And Jared Wilson (again) borrows from John Bunyen in “The Gospel Empowering its Own Implications Is Poetry.”

That’s a lot of wisdom crammed into very little time spent reading it. I trust that you’ll make up for all that time saved with diligent reflection.

Pro Rege

Youth Ministry Update

by Pastor JR Cuevas

We have had the great privilege this year of ministering to another incredible pair of high school seniors – Cole Short and Jenna Kim. As their youth pastor, it’s been an interesting experience shepherding the both of them, as there could not be more distinct in their personalities. Cole – state-ranked high jumper – began attending LBC in the latter part of 2008 upon the encouragement of his older brother. Jenna – a skilled videographer – has been at LBC as long as (or longer than) anyone else in the church. It’s hard to find a young man more energetic than Cole, and you’ll be hard-pressed to find a young lady more initially reserved than Jenna. As in-coming college freshmen, Cole aspires a major in international studies. Jenna – home economics and communications. Cole grew as the younger of two brothers; Jenna – the oldest of four sisters. During his free time, Cole can be writing songs while picking his acoustic guitar; Jenna prefers reading and spending time taking care of her sisters.

But what I’ve found even more amazing is how – through the saving grace of God – these two Torrey Pines High School seniors are amazingly similar when it comes to their spiritual walks. Both have confessed – with both heart and life – Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. Both love to write – and journal – about their spiritual insights (and both are incredibly good writers!) Both are extremely teachable – spiritual sponges always ready and eager to soak in instruction and wisdom from the Word of God and their youth leaders. During Friday night sermons, both look at me with an intense glare for the entire time I’m preaching without losing focus, indicating that they’re both listening, learning. Both have shared the gospel with non-Christian classmates and friends far more than I have – easily putting me to shame in the realm of evangelism. Both – individually – have asked me for copies of all of the outlines of the Sunday School messages that I’ve taught. Both hurled at me a flury of questions, as to how to make the most God-honoring decision concerning where to go to college. Both decided on their own volition to attend Christian colleges.

Recently, we held the second of our college table talks with Cole and Jenna, where I and a few of the other staff members gave them an opportunity to ask as many questions as they had about college – whether it be concerns or just general inquiries. The staff and myself were simply amazed with their maturity indicated by the depth of insight that they both had in the questions that they asked. It was clear both had a greater goal in mind than just doing well in college; they were both genuinely seeking to do college to the glory of God, and were eager to glean wisdom from their older brothers and sisters as to how they could do that. Chris Tou, one of the staff members who helped run the table talk, said it well: “These kids are intense!” Really, these two are anything but kids; they’ve proven themselves to be young adults capable of making God-honoring decisions.

I think it would be a fair conclusion to say that, aside from their parents, no one is more proud of these seniors than I am. To have had the opportunity to guide two college-bound seniors who have shown – through their daily growth and life decisions – a fear of the Lord is a privilege that I will always thank the Lord for. They’ve brought so much joy to my heart, and I’ll miss them both. Yet, I’m confident that the Lord who started a good work in them will complete it until the day of Christ Jesus.

Cole and Jenna, I’m praying for you guys.

Living Theology #22 – God’s Covenants

by Garrett Glende

A moment of honesty here: these articles are not always easy to write. I’m not seminary trained and I’m only twenty-two years old. I don’t have every aspect of doctrine settled in my mind at this point in my Christian life, and I don’t expect this to be coming very soon. Up until now, following along with Grudem’s book has been fairly straightforward, as most of the chapters have dealt with topics that are generally undisputed among evangelicals. However, there have been a few times where I’ve read something that Grudem wrote and disagreed with it to some degree. The first thing I do when this happens is question myself – who am I to know better than one of the premier theologians of our day? Sometimes I’m fairly confident in my assertions, other times I really don’t know what to think at all. This makes it difficult to have to sit down and write an article with confidence, knowing that there is so much more out there for me to think through and develop in my mind. As you read these articles, know that what’s here is only the tip of the iceberg. We will never exhaust the full knowledge of an infinite God. I encourage everyone to grab your Bible’s and get into the Word itself. Read books. Read more books. There are too many great resources out there to just let them all collect dust while we sit at home and watch people playing pretend on TV. Anyway, the reason I bring this all up is because I’ve encountered this again this week. The topic is one that I still don’t have a firm grasp on, but the knowledge I have gained has also lead me to disagree with Mr. Grudem (something that is a little scary for me to do). Proceed with discernment and seek the truth. It does matter.

The issue at hand is the nature of God’s covenants with man. Grudem proposes a system of viewing Scripture, and all history, through the lens of these different covenants which together form the basis for the aptly named Covenant Theology. This doctrinal stance is widely held in Presbyterian and Reformed denominations and views Scripture in light of three (or sometimes two) covenants: the covenant of works, the covenant of redemption, and the covenant of grace. I’ll first outline how Grudem defines these and then offer a brief response.

The Covenant of Works

Provided Grudem’s definition of a covenant as “an unchangeable, divinely imposed legal agreement between God and man that stipulates the conditions of the relationship,” he describes this “covenant of works” as one that God made with Adam in the garden before the fall. Evidence for this is taken from the idea that God initiated a promise to Adam in Genesis 2:16-17 when He commanded him not to eat of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, for that would bring about death. Although the word is not explicitly mentioned, Grudem argues that there is indeed a covenant in effect because of the binding provisions and promise of blessing (implicit) or consequence of disobedience. Grudem says that there are aspects of this covenant still alive today. For instance, if it were possible to live in perfect obedience to God’s law, then we would inherit the blessings promised in the covenant. Also, “the punishment for this covenant of works is still in effect, for ‘the wages of sin is death’” (Rom. 6:23). However, there are ways in which this covenant is not applicable, as we are not expected to obey the command not to eat of the tree and are completely incapable of righteousness due to our sinful natures.

The Covenant of Redemption

This covenant is slightly different from the others in that it is not one that was made between God and man, but rather within the members of the Trinity. “It is an agreement among the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, in which the Son agreed to become man, be our representative, obey the demands of the covenant of works on our behalf, and pay the penalty for sin, which we deserved.” Grudem notes that this is classified as a covenant because it is something that has specific parties involved as well as promises and conditions. Although different from the covenants made with man, it still can be thought of as such because of these reasons.

The Covenant of Grace

Grudem writes that the covenant of grace was initiated after the fall because God saw it necessary to “establish another means, one by which man could be saved.” From this point on, God would deal with His people according to this plan. Christ would be the one to mediate the covenant, conditioned on the faith of man as a requirement to take part in the promised blessings of God. These blessings were mainly found in the reality of eternal life with the Creator and the forgiveness of sin. A main passage cited by covenant theologians is Jeremiah 31 where God says that He will “make a new covenant with the house of Israel and the house of Judah, not like the covenant that I made with their fathers on the day when I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt, my covenant that they broke…I will put my law within them, and I will write it on their hearts. And I will be their God, and they shall be my people.” Grudem argues that this promise made to Israel is ultimately fulfilled in the church, God’s people.

Concerns

Again, it’s hard for me to disagree, but there are a few things that I must point out. The biggest issue that I see in covenant theology is the necessity to use different hermeneutics for different portions of Scripture. While many covenant theologians use a grammatical-historical approach to the majority of God’s word, they switch to a more allegorical method when confronted with these types of passages. It forces them to spiritualize promises that were explicitly made to be fulfilled in a literal sense. For example, there is no reason to believe that the above passage from Jeremiah is meant to be read as applied to anyone else but the Jews. God specifically states that the new covenant is for “the house of Israel and the house of Judah.” Later on in chapter 32, God promises that this covenant will include the restoration of their original land that they had been driven out of. If the scattering of Israel was literal, should not the restoration be as well?

Covenant theology insists that the future blessings promised to Israel are now fulfilled in the church. Many believe that there was a church during the Old Testament, but it was simply spiritual in nature. Again, this premise requires an inconsistent hermeneutic. Besides, Jesus is clear in Matthew 16:18 that the building of the church is something that is to take place in the future. This theology attacks the very faithfulness of God to His people and creates unnecessary spiritualizing of otherwise unambiguous texts.

Application

This whole debate aside, it is clear that God does establish covenants with man. The fact that God does this alone, on His own initiative should cause us to fall to our knees and submit to Him. Who are we that God should be mindful of us? How could He even want to be in a relationship with sinful man? Through the study of God’s covenants the one thing that jumps out over and over is the complete faithfulness of God to His word. When He says something, He means it. What great comfort we can take in this wonderful aspect of God’s character. We don’t have to worry over the state of our salvation because God has promised that those who trust in the work of the Son alone shall be saved forever. This is a truth that never changes. God is faithful to this promise. He is faithful to bless “all the families of the earth” as promised in the Abrahamic covenant through the substitutionary death of His Son. Praise God that He is faithful to His word!

Honoring Your Parents in the Lord

by Pastor John Kim

As a young child, the Bible passage that we would most hear often is Ephesians 6:1-3: 1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”

It is obvious that to obey and honor your parents is one of the primary priorities children have to bring glory to God. The dilemma starts to arise in how does one transition from being a child under the authority of parents to making decisions that are independent from parental oversight. For those who have grown up in an Asian environment, the concept of filial piety is something that is clearly a part of the culture. Obedience to parents is an uncontested rule and to question or disobey your parents would bring great shame and dishonor to the family. Even for those that would say they are Christians, this issue has brought tremendous challenges when there are significant decisions that need to be made.

I can think of two issues that are very much at the forefront when considering how to deal with parents.

The first would be that of one’s life purpose. From a very early age, a child might hear that their greatest priority is to study hard, go to a good college, get a good job so that you could have a successful and fulfilled life. On the surface there isn’t anything necessarily wrong with this. It is only when you dig a little deeper and examine the motivations and desires that are underlying this kind of mindset do you see what is at the heart. Some parents are so insistent on this path that every possible way of enhancing potential success is not only considered but often taken in multiplied ways. It is not uncommon to hear of young children being tutored while in elementary school, not because they are deficient in their understanding but to try and exceed past the average standards that are expected for that particular stage. Understanding that the elite colleges also give weight to extracurricular activities and achievements, there is tremendous pressure to not only participate in all manners of disciplines such as music, athletics, and academically related activities, but to excel at the highest levels. As the drive for success starts early, the first three decades of life are pretty much dictated by this focus and does not end until the fruits of the labors are actually materialized. This of course does not automatically happen for everyone and those who fail to reach the highest levels of success are then trapped within the consequences of the time, energy, finances, and sacrifices that all come with this. Even with success does not come the peace that one would assume will be there awaiting at the top of the mountain. In fact, success breeds continued expectations as well as the realization that there is always more to be attained. There is also the inevitable empty feeling of “What now?” when the highest levels of achievement have been reached. It is not as satisfying as one would think. Just consider the legions of celebrities, superstar athletes, politicians, and other significant figures that most would consider to have reached the pinnacle. Why is there still a lack of contentment?

This issue is compounded when you throw in the element of your commitment to Christ and how it is manifested through your involvement in the local church. This seems to especially be profound at our church in light of our church- planting plans for San Jose where a number of people on the team are facing incredible pressure from their parents, being questioned as to their very sanity as to how could someone make church a defining point for direction in their life. It seems absolutely ludicrous and crazy that someone would quit his or her job, relocate to a completely foreign area, and go all because of church. Even those who grew up in the San Jose area are facing opposition for their decisions when you would think that their families would welcome them back. It is very strange and odd to watch this take place.

The second issue would be that of one’s life partner. I can’t think of anything that has generated more trauma in a person’s life than to be in the position where your parents do not want you to date, get engaged, or be married to someone that they absolutely disapprove. Whether the parents are Christians or not, the emotional impact is so overwhelming that it almost feels like a hurricane that wreaks havoc not only in the lives of those who are directly involved, but there is collateral damage amongst even others who might get in the way. I have personally been threatened verbally and even physically by parents who are very upset that I would not intervene on their behalf. I have seen and heard shocking things from adults who would otherwise seem to be dignified and respectable people. Whether they are Christian or not, the defining principle that seems to be unassailable is that of honoring and obeying the will of the parents. If an individual chooses not to follow what the parents desire, there are often threats, ultimatums, and some have gone as far as to cut off all ties with their children. It is sad and heartbreaking to see take place, but it continues to happen to the sorrow of many.

So what is the answer to these problems? I can only say that there are no simple quick fix solutions but there are foundations truths that really need to underlie HOW one would respond to both situations so that while you are honoring your parents, it will not come at the cost of compromising the glory of God.

Principle #1 – Start with the glory of God

Romans 11:36
36 For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.

While honoring parents is an important truth in life, glorifying God must be the highest priority. This is not to say it is always so easy to apply – it takes prayerful consideration and effort to place God at the center of the whole process of gauging the heart for motives and the mind for the decision making process. The glory of God must be considered at the start and the finish as well as throughout the process of working through issues. This doesn’t guarantee that things will work out neat and clean but it does provide the proper foundation and perspective that will carry you through the process. We cannot afford to be Machiavellian in our strategy where the end justifies the means. The means are to be just as centered on the glory of God as the end is that God would receive the glory.

At a practical level we need to ask the question if we fear God or fear man through how we face challenges. Put another way, do we seek the approval of God or the approval of man? Do we find the expedient way preferable because we can avoid the hassle and trouble or are we willing to persevere through the trials so that God’s name might be magnified? This is an honest struggle for most people and while it at times could seem a bit theoretical, the ramifications are profound. The more we seek to please man, the easier we will find it to please man and what will be compromised is the glory of God. In seeking the glory of God, it does not necessarily mean we are trying to make things difficult in our human relationships, but it does mean that we are going to submit all things first and foremost to the Lordship of Christ and to see if we are truly following Christ in our heart motivation and attitude in how we conduct ourselves, even if it might incur the wrath of our parents. Our goal is not to incite conflict but to really make worshipping God the central premise to all of life.

Principle #2 – Process Biblically

2 Timothy 3:16-17
16 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, 17 that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work.

If we truly believe that God’s Word is sufficient, then the authority of Scripture must show itself in this fourfold application. Is the Word of God the basis for the teaching which I follow? Does it provide the foundation for how it reproves my attitude and actions? Do I follow it in terms of how it would correct me in bringing me back to the right path that honors God? Does it provide the parameters for how I will train and discipline my life toward godliness? If the Word of God does its work of conviction and transformation, then I will be able to discern the will of God as Romans 12:2 promises and it will mature me to be sufficiently equipped to do every good work, even in the midst of difficult circumstances.

Psalm 19:7-11 describes the Word of God in terms that show a clear effect on our lives. We can trust the character of God’s Word because it is perfect, sure, right, pure, clean, enduring forever, true, and righteous. As a result, it revives the soul, makes wise the simple, rejoices the heart, enlightens the eyes, provides warning, and finally there is great reward. If we really desire and treasure God’s Word, it will keep us from sin (Psalm 119:11) and it will direct our paths like a lamp to our feet when we try to navigate the sensitive and often arduous trails of working out things with our parents.

But if we instead lean on worldly wisdom and pragmatic thinking, we might pursue superficial appeasement to stem off the emotional attacks but in the long term it will breed resentment and bitterness. It is something that is confirmed over and over again when I consider the many people I have had a chance to counsel and observe in facing these issues. You might choose the immediate solution of pleasing your parents so as to avoid dealing with their anger but it never addresses the heart of the problems. Trusting God is definitely not an easy thing to do but as Proverbs 3:5-6 states, there is a great promise that comes when we trust the Lord with all our hearts – He will direct our paths when we acknowledge Him in all our ways.

There seems to be a very strong correlation to how healthy someone’s interaction with the Word of God is and their overall spiritual health. This has profound impact on how you will respond to difficult situations as the Word of God is the instrument through which the Holy Spirit, the Counselor, the Comforter, helps guide and direct us in providing wisdom and discernment in how to tread the delicate path of glorifying God while at the same time trying to honor our parents. It is not only possible but it is doable as we have the promises of God to lead the way.

While every situation that you go through in dealing with your parents might not be mentioned specifically in Scripture, there are principles which help build the foundations for a God-centered worldview that ultimately will guide you in making decisions that will be consistent in bringing God glory and in magnifying Christ. Often times it will be very much in contradiction to the status quo ways of the world and you must anticipate that the world and even at times those who say they are Christians will not agree with you and sometimes will even get very angry with how you might respond. But there is a comfort and strength that comes when convictions are centered around the glory of God and His righteousness and you will not ever regret choosing the narrow path that is laid down by the Word of God.

Principle #3 – Walk in the Spirit

Galatians 5:16-26
16 But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. 17 For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. 19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, 21 envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. 24 And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.

As believers, it is impossible to truly live to the glory of God apart from the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives. It really is an effort in futility to try and resolve conflicts with our parents when we are attempting to do so in our own power and wisdom. Just as we cannot use worldly wisdom, we also cannot afford to use human ability or power but instead we must be filled with the Spirit so that we may walk by the Spirit in order to manifest the fruit of the Spirit in our lives from our hearts. Filial piety is often times only skin deep because the heart is not necessarily genuine behind the external behavior. There must be a true honoring and respecting of parents that comes from a heart that is driven by the Holy Spirit to love and respond with grace and kindness, even in situations that are difficult.

Principle #4 – Magnify Christ

2 Corinthians 5:14-15
14 For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; 15 and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised.

Often times parents will use the “guilt” card and try to remind us of all the hard work and sacrifices that they endured so as to provide a better life for us. This is not to say that we should not be thankful for all that our parents have done. Indeed we should be grateful and even show our gratitude in tangible ways. But we must remember that there is someone who gave the greatest sacrifice of all – His very death on the cross and if there is any motivation that we should have, it should be out of the love we have for the one who loved us first. To love Christ demands my all, my heart, my soul, the entirety of my being. That’s why at times there is a test of loyalty that challenges us to the point where there is the possibility of being cut off by parents and family. This is never something to be taken lightly or conceded easily but at the same time we need to really ask if Jesus Christ does have the greatest authority over our lives as Lord or are we subtly trying to avoid that by even appealing to Scriptures that say we need to honor our parents so that we can avoid conflict. I would never treat this kind of situation flippantly but it would need to be done prayerfully but there will come a time when you will have to choose between Christ’s authority and your parents because they will not match in seeking first God’s kingdom and God’s righteousness. Remember the promise that Christ gave that He would always be with us (Matthew 28:20). Remember that He will be faithful not only to carry us, but to provide for us all that we need, even the loss of family. This is not to say that it will always be the case that family ties are lost. In fact, it is usually rare for someone to be completely disowned. But even the threat of it can weigh heavy on a person’s heart so we need to remember that we can’t afford to let threats dislodge the Lordship of Christ being the supreme authority over every aspect of our lives, even our education and our future marriage.

There’s always a lot more to say but hopefully this will be starting point for people to consider how they can interact with their parents to God’s glory.

Pride and Selfishness

by Steve Preslar

Philippians 2:3-4
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.

The first four words sum it all up. “Do nothing from selfishness.” We would all do well to measure our motives for service every time we serve. Is our service to Christ and one another rooted in a true desire to see the needs of others met with no regard to our own wants or needs? Or as Pastor John had said, am I just trying to be one of the “pretty people?” Well, sadly I think that many of us can say that our motives have not always been in-line with God’s Word. If we choose to serve one another either in the context of the church or outside the context of church we need to make sure our motives are pure.

Pride is self-importance and self-focus – which leads to selfishness which is prideful thinking and prideful actions – which is the opposite of Jesus’ command of agape love (John 13:34). Pride and selfishness always go together. A truly humble person cannot be selfish at the same time. Pride is the root of selfishness – and thus the root of all evil. Pride is hidden but manifests as selfish acts. Selfishness is the obvious problem, but pride feeds it. Dealing with the root cause of the problem is the only lasting solution. Pride produces selfishness, and all selfishness is pride. Doing things yourself, on your own, is a part of selfishness. Prayer is the opposite of doing things yourself. We must desire God’s: will, done in God’s time, and done God’s way.

So pride and selfishness are rooted in every sin. If you remember, Satan got thrown out of heaven for placing his will above God’s (Isaiah 14:12-17), and it was Adam and Eve’s pride and independence that introduced sin into the world (Genesis 3). There are a whole host of other examples in scripture that testify to this fact. Why did King David commit adultery with Bathsheba? Selfishness. Why did he later murder Uraih, Bathsheba’s husband? Selfishness. In the New Testament, Acts chapter 5 we see Ananias and Sapphira’s sin of lying to the Holy Spirit. Why did they lie? Selfishness. I could go on with example after example and we would see that pride and selfishness are indeed at the root of all sin.

In Philippians 2:3-4, why do you think selfishness is listed first? It’s because we are so prone to it. So what are we doing about it? Simply, we do what the passage says. We just don’t do it. Simple huh? Being selfish is easy, its like water flowing down a stream. There is very little resistance to it. Not being selfish is hard work. It takes a very conscious effort on your part to set aside your own ambitions and perceived needs and interest for those of Christ or another person. I am not saying this is easy but it is written for our instruction. We should strive to be selfless. I am sure that most of us have read Philippians 2:3-4 more times then we can count, but have you taken the time to meditate on it? If not I encourage you to take some time this week to do so. Be honest with God, ask Him to reveal those areas in your life where selfishness has taken root, and then when He does show you, be obedient and be “doers of the word” (James 1:22).