Biblical Friendship #1: The Friendship Survey

by Josh Liu

In January 2015, the Lumos youth ministry held its annual winter retreat and focused on the theme of friendship. I summarized the sessions in a previous post – please read that post first.

However, there have been numerous individuals asking for details concerning this topic. Parents, working adults, teens, and children (students, employers, rich, poor, Christian, Buddhist, etc.)–everyone is confronted with the issue of friendship. Thus, each staffer has worked to expand his or her session to describe what God’s Word has to say concerning friendship (and issues related to friendship). We pray that this series challenges, exhorts, and encourages you to biblically consider how to glorify God in your friendships (cf. 1 Cor. 10:31).

Let us begin by exposing our presuppositions and evaluating our current friendships. Take time to consider the following probing questions:

  1. What makes a friend?
  2. What qualities make a good friend?
  3. Why are you friends with your current friends? Do you spend time with people you don’t consider as your friends? Why or why not?
  4. Do you have a best friend? What is one word that describes your best friend?
  5. What makes a friend a best friend?
  6. Why do friends drift apart or friendships change?
  7. What is the biggest problem in friendships?
  8. Do you have friends of the opposite gender? Do you have a best friend of the opposite gender? Do you have a preference as to having male or female friends?
  9. Can boys and girls be friends? Explain.
  10. Do you consider yourself a good friend? Explain.
  11. How is God involved in your friendships? Do you believe that all your friendships honor and exalt God?
  12. How does God’s Word specifically guide you in your friendships?

Tomorrow, Jonathan Yang (from LBCLA) lays the foundation of our examination by describing the necessity of being made friends with God. Naturally, sinful man is opposed to God and operates as an enemy of God, dishonoring and disobeying Him. God graciously draws near to the sinner and, through Christ’s incarnation, righteous life, substitutionary death, and sin-conquering bodily resurrection, reconciles man to Himself and bestows on him the position of a friend. If you remain an enemy of God, nothing else matters! You cannot have God-honoring and filling friendships with others if you do not have friendship with God. You must repent of your sins and turn to Christ believing that His death and resurrection can save you from God’s righteous wrath against your sins.

“The friendship of the LORD is for those who fear him, and he makes known to them his covenant.” (Psalm 25:14)