A Realistic Perspective of Ministering to People in the Church

by Pastor John Kim

2015 has been a significant year in that I have surpassed the half century mark. To be honest, I didn’t think I would make it this far. I was surprised that I made it to 40 years and the past decade had me convinced that I would either die of a heart attack, stroke, or at the least a broken heart after having faced some tsunami-like waves of trials that seem to come every few years.

But if there is anything I keep learning, it is that as a Christian, not to mention as a Christian pastor, there are some lessons that continue to deepen and gain greater clarity over time. Some lessons simply will not make as much sense in your 20’s or 30’s, not to mention your 40’s and 50’s. I’m sure there is much more wisdom that will be gained when you hit your 60’s and 70’s and if you are blessed to get to the 80’s and 90’s and still are coherent enough to understand what is going on, I can only imagine that the wisdom and knowledge that has been steeped in the trials and tests of life will be like a fine wine that can only be truly appreciated when it has matured over time and is then enjoyed to the fullest.

One set of lessons that I keep learning is how to minister to people. In a recent book written by Collin Hansen titled Blind Spots, Tim Keller in the foreword writes about the legacy of Jonathan Edwards and how various factions would lay claim to Edwards as their hero regarding a commitment to doctrinal orthodoxy, or to cultural engagement, or to revivals and missions. An interesting observation is made that the Princetonian theologies, such as Charles Hodge and B.B. Warfield were indeed faithful to the Reformed theology of Edwards but were not as sensitive to matters of revival and spiritual experiences. There were those of another mindset, even Jonathan Edwards Jr., who were social activists, abolitionists, and creative theological thinkers, but they abandoned biblical orthodoxy. Then there were those like Charles Finney who embraced the concepts of revivalism but were vehemently opposed to the Reformed heritage of Edwards. Over time these various factions would war against each other, all the while appealing to Edwards for their heritage but if Edwards were to witness all that was done in his name, you would wonder if he could stomach all of the chaos.

Why is this an important thing to consider? I see similar veins of thought in our current day as well. You have what Keller calls the “courage” group that stands valiantly for the truth; the “compassion” people that stress service, listening, and engagement; and the “commissioned” folks who are committed to building the church and reaching the lost. Keller goes on to say, “Once things are broken down like that, it becomes clear that these should be strands in a single cord. Each group goes bad to the degree it distances itself from the others.”

I think when we are younger, we are prone to fixate on a particular bent or way of thinking that emphasizes certain things, such as truth, or love, or social justice, or whatever it is that catches your attention. But getting older doesn’t necessarily bring balance. Some times you will simply get hardened in your way of thinking to the point where you can only see the faults in others while you are blind to your own. These are the kind of people who hear what they want to hear, see what they want to see, and react and respond according to the grid that they have setup in their own minds as how they interpret and discern things. Much of this is an issue of being patient and cultivating maturity that will only come with time. It doesn’t happen overnight.

After pastoring for 28 years (has it been that long?), there are some things that I have been able to observe about people in the church. If there is one thing that is challenging in ministry, it is not only dealing with people, it is trying to discern and understand where they are spiritually.

The parable of the soils (Matthew 13:3-9; 18-23) provides a general kind of backdrop when it comes to having what I believe would be a biblical perspective.

  1. The Stone Hearted
  2. The Pretenders
  3. The Status Quo
  4. The Faithful

1. The Stone Hearted

The soil represented here is that there is no soil. The seed of the Word hits the hardened heart of one who does not understand it and the enemy snatches it away before it can do anything (Matthew 13: 19). The people that fit this category essentially represent those whose hearts are closed to the gospel and to Christ. There is nothing you can do to connect with them, no matter how much effort, no matter how much care, no matter how much sensitivity or even with hammer blows, there is no positive response. This really is because the eyes are blind and the heart is hard and the ears are not willing to hear the truth. Only the Holy Spirit can open the eyes and soften the heart and unplug the ears so that the truth of the gospel will do its work of transforming the soul of a person.

Why is this helpful to know in terms of ministry? This kind of heart can really be at the center of why there is no substantial response to the preaching/teaching ministry as well as the shepherding and care that is extended. The difficulty lies in the reality that this is not always so evident when it comes to assessing a person’s spiritual condition. The stone heart can be covered by a nice smile, a winning personality, and someone who is very outgoing and even socially involved. There are those who would actually seem to be pleasant people and you can have good conversations but at the end of the day, nothing happens. Sometimes we think we have to try something different or just try harder when in fact there is really nothing you can do until God breaks the heart of stone and turns it into a heart of flesh that can receive the truth of God and be sensitive to the Spirit of God. All you can really do in the end is pray for these people because your efforts are not going to change anything. Does this mean we don’t stop caring or ministering to these people? No, but it does help us have a better perspective so that we would not be discouraged by the lack of response.

2. The Pretenders

This soil represents the kind of person who seems to initially respond to the ministry of the Word. There seems to be even a quick reaction but it is only temporary because it doesn’t last. Why? Because when affliction or persecution arises, this person falls away (Matthew 13:21).

There are those who seem to be part of the church family as they attend and even serve. Some would even attain positions of leadership and exercise a great amount of influence and impact. But then something happens, whether suddenly or over time, and we find out that they never held to biblical conviction or truly believed in the gospel. It has been shocking because it often comes unexpectedly. But just like the parable of the soils, there are those whose faith is exposed when the wind of trials blows or when the self-serving agendas are brought to light that you see that they never were genuine.

This has been a very sobering reality in that not only is it something that you see happen with the average church member, but it happens even within leadership, especially those that are younger. There can be much zeal and passion and this can obviously be perceived as a blessing because churches are typically lacking in zeal and passion and that’s why it can seem like a breath of fresh air to have someone who stirs things up a bit and has a bit of that fiery spirit that spices things up. But all too often with that youthful exuberance comes an immaturity and even an arrogance that gets exposed through mistakes and misunderstandings and instead of responding with humility and teachability, there are extreme acts of betrayal and desertion that shows absolutely no signs of regret or repentance. While this doesn’t mean that all who struggle to this degree are not Christians, it is hard to say that someone is truly honoring God if they say one thing and then contradict through how they live for a sustained amount of time. It makes it very difficult to then understand how someone could present such an outward display of what seems to be saving faith and yet have such a shocking desertion. But this is not new. The apostle John shares this in 1 John 2:19 that there are those who will leave the church because they never were truly a believer. While this can be very confusing for many, we can know that these things were foretold by Jesus Himself. There will even be false prophets who will say, “Lord, Lord,” but will ultimately be exposed by their fruits because they didn’t truly know the Lord Jesus.

3. The Status Quo

The soil in which the thorns and weeds is probably the most common issue in many churches. You have many who hear the word week in and week out and yet the worries of the world and the deceitfulness of wealth chokes out the ministry of the word and as a result there is no lasting fruit (Matthew 13:22).

There are many who struggle with the ups and downs of the Christian life and manifest the highs and lows of their walk with God as well as with their attendance and service in the church. This would seem to be the majority of those who are a part of the local church and depending on the season of life (i.e., graduating from college, getting married, having children, etc.), you can see the challenges affect them in significant ways. Inconsistency in serving and even attending Sunday services can start to become patterns and difficult to break. Since many struggle with this kind of mentality, it can become the status quo and therefore be acceptable since the bar is quite low.

If there is one thing we see here in America, the opportunity to become wealthy has been a part of the expectation of life. But in the pursuit to become wealthy there are so many things that the world promises that many are duped and deceived into thinking that to become wealthy and prosperous is the main priority in life. You can especially see this lived out through the lives of those who in youth or college seem to be so dedicated and involved with the church or campus ministries but after they graduate and then start working, get married, and have children, there are so many who seem to turn away from the Christian faith, some claiming that they were never Christians in the first place. The things of this world, the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the boastful pride of life perfectly define their worldview in how they live. But many of these will still stay in the church because it is almost like a good luck charm or a guilt offering – at least going to church will make it seem like I’m a decent person. But there will be those who desert as well and they will blame-shift and try to point out the problems of the church, which simply masks the reality that their heart was never there in the first place.

The love of the world can wreak havoc in many churches because it affects so many people. The worries of the world is closely tied because if one is in love with the world, then you will be caught up with what you think the world thinks is important, keeping up with the trends, looking for worldly approval or fearing worldly rejection. You can even get caught up with the mundane things of life and be anxious about it to the point where it defines you. Such are the realities for many in the church and while it can be frustrating, we must remember that any one of us can be susceptible to being caught in the current of the world and it is not so simply to get out.

4. The Faithful and the Fruitful

The only soil in the parable that ends well is the one that is the fruitful soil, represented by those who hear the word and understand it and then do something that shows it has truly impacted their lives. There are two things that that really stand out about this soil – there is a hearing that results in understanding and there is a bearing of lasting fruit. This is not like the other soils in which the seed doesn’t even get a chance or never takes deep root or is choked out. These are true believers who stand the test of time and show that the Word of God has truly transformed their lives.

There are some incredibly dedicated and faithful men and women who endure and persevere in their testimonies of walking with God and serving the church. While this percentage is not high, it is a tremendous encouragement to still see those even from previous church ministries where I pastored continuing to run the race well and have been consistent over the years. But even with those that are genuine believers, there are challenges and struggles along the way and it is important to remember to be hopeful and to encourage them because they are not like the other soils where ultimately there is no true and lasting faith. There is a whole spectrum of believers that both the leaders of the church as well as the members of the church need to take into account and discern so that when you minister to them, you are truly coming alongside and helping them as God intended. This is not to say that we will never be mistaken regarding those who claim to be Christians but really are not. We cannot ultimately know the heart of a person but we can start to discern by whether there is lasting fruit or not in response to the ministry of the Word of God.

If there is one verse that I would encourage you to consider as you anticipate a new year of ministry in 2016, it would be the following:

“We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone. See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always see after that which is good for one another and for all people.” (1 Thessalonians 5:14-15)

Remember not to focus on just the admonishing but consider the rest of the verse. There should be a whole lot of encouraging, helping, and being patient with EVERYONE! Note the contrast given after that – do not repay evil with evil but ALWAYS see after that which is good for one another and for ALL people. That’s quite a tall order but this is why we were given the love of Christ and when the love of Christ controls us and compels us (2 Corinthians 5:14-15), we can remember that Christ came and died for us so that we would no longer live for ourselves but for Him and in loving Him we love those around us, especially those who are in our church family as He has seen fit to put those people in your life as a calling to minister.