by Pastor Patrick Cho

When I was engaged to Christine, we used to discuss what to expect in marriage with the older married couples of the church. Surprisingly and without fail, every couple warned us about the hardships and strains that come with marriage. We received almost no positive feedback or encouragement. Instead, the consistent report was that marriage was difficult. I remember growing a little disillusioned and even embittered by this at the time. I wondered, “Why did you get married at all if it’s so bad? Maybe it’s better to stay single since that’s so much easier!” I remember telling Christine that if other engaged couples talked to us about marriage, we were only going to speak positively to affirm how wonderful it is. They could get the discouraging news from everyone else!

Now that I have been married for over seven years, I understand better where those other couples were coming from and I agree with them that marriage is hard work. That isn’t all it is (it is wonderful, too!), but it certainly is that. I can see that those couples were lovingly trying to prepare us for the worst trials and experiences so that we would not be unnecessarily caught off guard or unprepared. The truth is that marriage is hard and it requires intense devotion, constant vigilance, and self-sacrifice. Paul wrote to the Corinthians that wives are to submit to their husbands, and husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Eph. 5:22, 25). These are not easy instructions! They are extremely difficult and even impossible apart from Christ.

There is a romantic tendency in many engaged Christian couples to think it won’t be as difficult for them. They reason, “We will never fight, and even if we do, we will reconcile quickly” or “Think about how great we get along! After all, how could marriage be all that different than dating?” Older, more experienced couples sometimes smile (scoff?) at the naivete and foolishness of young love. It is essential that young couples be prepared for the difficulties that come with marriage while still believing that it is a wonderful institution created by God for our good.

Does it have to be difficult? It depends on what you mean by “difficult.” Does it have to be exasperating and frustrating? I suppose not. But does it have to require hard work? Absolutely. This is because we are not naturally inclined to pursue God’s glory with our lives and relationships. We are not naturally inclined to love Him and others. Our sin stands in the way of our having ideal marriages, and unfortunately we deal with our sin (not to mention the sin of our spouses) every day. Too often we struggle with self-centeredness, pride, anger, jealousy, and discontentment. We struggle because our natural bent is merely to care for ourselves and satisfy our own desires.

Many marriages struggle today in particular because couples have failed at putting in the work to make their relationships strong and successful. Couples don’t spend quality time together but instead allow precious time to go wasted. Hundreds of opportunities to have meaningful conversations are averted. Too often the only times families pray together is before meals. Husbands come home from work with a sense of entitlement to rest and relaxation instead of investing in their marriages. TVs, computers, and gaming systems are flipped on and wives are neglected because of the desire to satisfy “me time.” I am particularly calling out husbands because the Bible teaches that the burden of responsibility to lead spiritually in the home rests on them.

Whose interests are most important in the home? Is it the interests of the husband who provides the leadership and direction? Is it the interests of the wife whom the husband serves and loves sacrificially? The answer is neither. Ultimately, both husband and wife need to think about God’s interests for their lives. The husband needs to consider what kind of man God wants him to be, and the wife needs to consider what kind of woman God wants her to be. It is ultimately about having a relationship that is honoring and glorifying to Him. But again, this takes work. It isn’t simply going to happen because both husband and wife are Christian. Spiritual health doesn’t just occur in a vacuum. They need to work at it in faith by being obedient to Scriptures commands and principles in full dependence on the Lord.

Ask yourself these questions to help gauge the spiritual quality of your marriage. Do you and your spouse regularly pray for and with one another? Do you and your spouse regularly talk about spiritual issues and concerns? Do you and your spouse read and study God’s Word together? Do you and your spouse actively love and serve others in the church? These are spiritual investments that will reap tremendous spiritual benefits for your marriage. But more so, working at spiritually strengthening your marriage will bring glory to God.

Besides focusing on spiritual concerns, practical steps can be taken to further strengthen the marriage bond. Do you and your spouse regularly and frequently affirm each other emotionally and physically? Do you make time for one another to have meaningful conversations? Do you have fun together and cultivate your friendship? Do you listen to each other’s requests, desires, and opinions? Do you endeavor to further learn about each other and deepen your relationship?

If you are solely focused on satisfying personal desires, if you believe you rightfully deserve “me time” at the expense of working at marriage, you shouldn’t be surprised that your marriage lacks the strength God intends it to have. Too many couples seek counseling when their relationship is all falling apart knowing that they haven’t done much to build up and sharpen each other (cf. Prov. 27:17). Sadly, most couples have some sense of what they need to do, but they simply don’t do it. This is one vital area where good intentions fall short and talk is cheap. Especially in prayer and dependence upon the Spirit of God, let’s work to build strong marriages for the glory of God.

by Pastor Patrick Cho

The Grace Life Family Ministry has only met twice so far since the summer ended, but it has been a great couple of weeks! I know that change is rarely easy to adapt to, but I was encouraged to see so many people come out on Thursday evenings. The Bible study not only provides a chance for our married couples and parents to open God’s Word together, but it also is a wonderful time of warm fellowship. It also helps tremendously that Kids’ Club meets at the same time, thus freeing up parents to worship undistracted.

Not only has the time changed for our meetings from Sunday mornings to Thursday evenings, but the format has changed as well. Last year, the study depended heavily on homework and small group discussions, but this year we are moving to more of a large group structure. This way everyone is able to walk through a particular passage of Scripture together and all who come can equally benefit from the discussion times and feedback.

We are currently walking through a study of the mind entitled, “What Do You Think?” The purpose of the study is to examine the effect that sin has on the mind and how God has allowed us as believers in Christ to think biblically. Last week, we looked specifically at Genesis 1, the creation account. In particular, we wanted to study what the Scriptures reveal about God because that would give us a solid foundation to think from.

God is the one who created everything that is, and He did so without any mistakes or slip ups. It was all very good. This helps us in how we think because it reminds us that God is the one who ultimately determines what is good from bad. He is the standard of goodness. That is not something we can accurately determine on our own. Oftentimes people come in judgment of God because He does not meet their standards of good, but the Scriptures don’t allow us that role reversal. God is good and has created what is good.

Besides revelation of God’s goodness, the creation account also helps establish the Creator/creature distinction. God is the almighty Creator who revealed His power, wisdom, and authority through what has been made (cf. Rom. 1:20). The more we meditate on the creation account, the more it should remind us that God is amazing in glory, and we completely fall short of His glory. Having this frame of mind is essential if we are going to learn how to think biblically.

It has been a rewarding study so far, but we’ve only just begun. I pray that everyone will continue to come out and that the study will really benefit us all!

by Pastor Patrick Cho

Summer has provided us a nice break from the routine at Lighthouse and hopefully everyone is rested and ready for the fall. One of the big changes that I am most looking forward to is the new format for Grace Life. In order to promote greater attendance, last year we had Grace Life meet during the Sunday School hour on Sunday mornings. Unfortunately, this also introduced several limiting factors that we felt needed to change. While it was nice to have the infrastructure of the children’s ministry in place, it was not conducive to encourage fellowship between affinity groups. Having Grace Life meet Sunday mornings also prevented people from receiving helpful instruction and equipping from other classes that were offered. For new members, since Fundamentals of the Faith is a required membership class, it meant that FOF and Grace Life would conflict for at least thirteen weeks.

Thus, the decision was made to move Grace Life midweek. This does several things for the ministry.

1. First, the infrastructure of children’s ministry is still in place because of midweek Kids’ Club.
2. Second, it opens up the opportunity for more people to be involved since it doesn’t conflict with other classes. This is particularly helpful for anyone who is teaching those Sunday School classes.
3. Third, it provides time midweek for the families of Lighthouse to come together for instruction and encouragement.

I hope everyone who is part of Grace Life is excited about the changes being made. Of course we know that this will not be convenient for everyone, but at this stage of the life of the church, I don’t think we’ll be able to come up with any format that suits everyone. I would just encourage those that are able to come out to do so. It is going to be a great year.

Many people were blessed with our first ever Grace Life Weekend Conference with Dr. Bob and Mary Somerville. Lord-willing, our desire is to plan another Weekend Conference this year focusing on the topic of parenting. All the audio from the weekend with Dr. Somerville is online, so if you were not able to make it out, I would encourage you to at least listen to the sessions.

The focus of Grace Life this year is going to be on the application of God’s Word. Our goal will be to help you think through various issues biblically. More specifically, we will be examining a biblical study of the mind. How are we to think? How does sin corrupt our thinking? Should we follow our hearts? How should we make decisions that honor God? These questions and more will be addressed in our times together. I know that it will be tremendously helpful for those who want to grow spiritually and who desire to walk more consistently in faith.

It is going to be an exciting year for Grace Life! If you are married or a parent at Lighthouse, I would encourage you to come out and be blessed by the instruction, fellowship, and worship together. There is great value in participation, as the author of Hebrews writes, “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works” (Heb. 10:24). The members of the church are called to make an investment in one another and this is not possible if we do not spend good quality time with each other. So, please come out and be involved!

by Stephen Rodgers

The media from the recent Grace Life Weekender has been posted and is now available for listening and downloading. The speaker was Dr. Bob Somerville, who is both a teacher at TMC and a council member at BCC.

If you know the proper names for the first, second, and 4th sermon, please drop me a line.

• Grace Life Weekender 1
• Grace Life Weekender 2
• Men’s Session
• Women’s Session
• Grace Life Weekender 4
• The Home and the Gospel

by Pastor Patrick Cho

How well do you know your spouse? If you are like most, you might agree that you know your spouse pretty well, but perhaps you don’t know him or her as well as you might think. Perhaps you know that the communication in your marriage is weak. If that’s the case, it may just need some exercise. Consider the following questions:

1. How is your partner doing spiritually? What are your partner’s greatest spiritual struggles? How can you be praying for him or her? How is your partner’s time in God’s Word?
2. What brings your partner the greatest joys in your marriage? In life?
3. What are your partner’s greatest fears?
4. What are your some of your partner’s greatest disappointments?
5. What does your partner think you do well in your relationship?
6. What does your partner wish you would do better in your relationship?

Were you able to answer these questions? If not, it might be a good idea to go on a date with your spouse and talk about some of them.

Communication is probably always going to be an issue in marriage relationships. Men and women simply don’t communicate the same way and oftentimes misunderstand each other. Sometimes the problem is a failure to listen. Other times, the problem lies in difficulty with communicating clearly or specifically. Whatever the case, most couples would agree that a great percentage of the conflicts that arise in marriage stem from a failure to communicate well.

Not surprisingly, we find our example of effective communication in the Lord. He is the perfect communicator because He not only delivers the message perfectly (cf. John 17:17), but He also grants the ability to understand it (cf. 1 Cor. 2:12-14). Inasmuch as we strive to communicate well, we pattern ourselves after the God who made us and made known to us His will. In the Scriptures we find:

1. God clearly communicates His existence and attributes (Rom. 1:19-20).
2. God clearly communicates our need for Him (Mark 1:15).
3. God clearly communicates His love (John 3:16; Rom. 5:8).
4. God clearly communicates salvation for His people (Ps. 16:11; 98:2; Eph. 1:7-10).
5. God clearly communicates His will (2 Tim. 3:16-17; 1 John 5:3).

Certainly there is much more in Scripture that God communicates, but this just goes to show that when God wants His people to know something, He communicates it effectively.

This does not mean that everyone will understand everything that God intends. Paul had made it clear in 1 Corinthians 2:14 that the natural man cannot understand the things of God. This is not because God’s message is deficient or incomplete, but because the human heart is darkened in its understanding and blinded by sin. God shines the light of Christ in the hearts of men and illumines their minds to understand the truth by His grace.

Communication is key to building a healthy relationship. It is like a muscle that needs to be exercised regularly. This is true in our relationship with God, and it is true in our relationships with one another. We grow more intimately acquainted with God as we come to understand what brings Him joy, what He desires, and what He requires of us. We are drawn closer to Him as we learn more about who He is and what He is like. The same is true when it comes to our marriage relationships. As we work out to know our partner better, to understand his or her joys, desires, fears, and frustrations, we too will build a stronger and healthier relationship.

by Pastor Patrick Cho

When Christine and I were expecting our first child, someone told us about a website where we could get a prediction of the baby’s gender based on Christine’s birth date and the date of conception. We checked out the website because we thought it would be fun to see what it would say. We were told that it was a “Chinese thing,” but we weren’t given any more information than that. I just assumed that with all the births in China over the centuries, they must have figured out a pattern or at least kept detailed statistics. Unfortunately, we found out later that this system wasn’t based on statistics at all, but on Chinese astrology and mysticism.

Upon looking further at some of the other links on the website, I wasn’t surprised to see that the makers of the site also offered predictions on wedding days that would help ensure successful marriages and “magic dating matches” to ensure happiness in dating relationships. Using these services would be similar to a person’s visiting or calling a psychic or reading a horoscope. Like with psychic hotlines, these sites typically included some sort of disclaimer that their services are merely for entertainment purposes.

A growing concern at Lighthouse is that many expecting couples visit these websites to see what they will predict. The greater issue is not whether a person could find some entertainment in visiting these sites to see the prediction of their baby’s gender. The greater issue is whether a Christian should be visiting these sites at all. I understand that most people who go to these websites do so purely for entertainment. I don’t think anyone at the church would seriously give any credence to the reliability of Chinese astrology. What is troubling, however, is that some endorse these sites enthusiastically saying “it really works” or “it’s amazing how accurate it is.” As Christians, we need to be more discerning about how we entertain ourselves and what we want to be associated with. These are things believers should not be engaged in even if the predictions were 100% accurate.

There is another practice in Korean culture after the baby is born. Typically on the baby’s first birthday (Kor. ddol or tol), several items will be placed in front of the baby. Depending on what the baby grabs, it is supposed to predict the future of the child. If the baby grabs money or rice, he will be rich. If the baby grabs a pencil, he will be smart. If the baby grabs a thread, he will be blessed with long life. Again, when Christian parents do this, it is explained away as pure fun or Korean tradition. But the tradition has its roots in Confucianism. In fact, even the child’s traditional outfit includes a symbolic belt for long life and pouch for good luck. Most Christians don’t know this, but traditionally in the ddol, the mother is supposed to pray to a mountain god and a birth goddess for luck and long life for the child.

I understand that it is a Korean cultural tradition to do these things at a child’s first birthday or that it is fun to get a Chinese gender prediction, but with things like this the principles and truths of God’s Word must take precedence over tradition and entertainment because of the false religion and spirituality associated with them. Idol worship was a huge part of the Corinthians culture. In fact, you could hardly purchase meat at the market without it having been sacrificed to an idol previously. The Corinthians asked Paul about the issue of eating meat that they had known had been sacrificed to idols. While the gods of the pagans were no gods at all, and therefore there was no blessing or curse on the meat itself, Paul still instructed the church to abstain from eating that meat because of the association with idol worship. There is no demon in the meat, but there are demons in the false religion (1 Cor. 10:19-22).

This is also why the Bible is clear when it comes to worldly myths – Paul told Timothy to encourage the church to have nothing to do with them (1 Tim. 1:3-4; 4:7). These worldly myths and superstitions were actually opposed to godliness and truth. As believers, we are called to associate with the things of God. This doesn’t mean that God does not want us to have fun. He is not some cosmic killjoy or divine party-pooper. In fact, Scripture teaches that if you are in Christ, God’s will for your life is that it would be good, acceptable, and perfect (Rom. 12:2). God desires your good and for you to rejoice always in Him (Phil. 4:4). The Christian life is not drab and dull, but vibrant and exciting. But your excitement and entertainment should come from things that are consistent with your testimony.

Next time you hear of a couple who is expecting, rather than encouraging them to visit these Chinese astrology websites, why not take some time to just sit and pray with them? Instead of celebrating your Korean baby’s first birthday by having him choose an item to determine his fate, why not lead the guests of the party in prayer for the child. We have a responsibility to demonstrate for the watching world that Jesus makes a difference in our lives. Some might dismiss us as legalistic or dull, but I would rather be wrongfully accused than to willingly engage in wickedness.

Christians are called to do all things in the name of Christ (Col. 3:17) and to the glory of God (1 Cor. 10:31). This will take particularly deliberate effort and resolve in an Asian family context whose culture is rooted in Buddhism, Confucianism, and Eastern mysticism. I hardly see how God could be glorified in our participation in the traditions of false religion, and as a believer of Korean descent, I can happily forsake some aspects of culture and tradition in order to more fully pursue Christ and be consistent in my testimony.

by Pastor Patrick Cho

Pastor John Kim recently had an opportunity to visit us from San Jose and attend on Sunday morning. One of the things he wanted to do was to peek in each of the Sunday School classes to see what was going on. I’m sure this provided an encouraging perspective since pastors so rarely have the opportunity to see all the moving parts of a church functioning together in one morning. He let me know that one of the things that particularly encouraged him was to see the participation and turn out for Grace Life.

Although meeting on Sunday mornings during the Sunday School hour might not be the best time for some, it has provided a chance for married couples to attend Bible study together during a time where childcare is adequately provided. These were some of the factors that we wanted to see in our family ministry. Certainly everything is not perfect in terms of the structure, but I doubt it could be. Our goal is simply to do our best to equip and disciple our married couples and parents. Their participation in the ministry is vital to accomplish that goal.

We have still been walking through the John Barnett book, Word Filled Families. Those who are not able to attend the class can track our progress and follow along online. All the homework sheets, Scripture memory passages, and large group instruction can be found on the website. The book has been incredibly challenging and encouraging. It provides helpful, biblical instruction about how to maintain a godly marriage and family. Even if you are not able to attend the class, we would certainly recommend reading the book.

The Bible study is fairly informal and can be broken down into two main parts. Typically before the teaching time, everyone is asked to break up into groups to discuss the week’s assignment. There they can deliberate about the homework questions, particularly focusing on practical application. We must always remember that without proper application of God’s truth, the accumulation of knowledge helps little (cf. 1 Cor. 8:1).

The second part of the Bible study is reserved for large group teaching. Those who attend will realize that this is not necessarily the most emphasized part of our time together. The general purpose of Grace Life is to allow couples and parents to discuss biblical principles with one another, to provide opportunities for fellowship, accountability, and prayer. At times, the teaching is very limited to allow more time for interaction. Understandably, on occasion by exception, the teaching receives the bulk of the time.

I really believe the time together at Grace Life has been greatly profitable. But as I mentioned at the beginning of the term, what people get out of it will be directly proportionate to what they put in. The more they invest time to read, hear, study, memorize, and meditate, and the more they seek to apply the principles of God’s truth individually and towards one another, the more they will profit from the class and advance spiritually.

If you are married and/or a parent, and haven’t been coming out to Grace Life, we would encourage you to do so. You have been missing out on a great opportunity to fellowship with fellow “marrieds” and parents. Each of the lessons in the book is independent of the others so joining mid-term would be fairly easy. Come see what all the buzz is about! And by the way, generally, we have food each week. Certainly this shouldn’t be the primary reason for coming, but it is helpful.

by Pastor Patrick Cho

Grace Life Family Ministry has been continuing to meet on Saturday mornings during the Sunday School hour. It has been really encouraging to see the participation of so many of our married couples and parents. Especially because of the difficulties involved with working around children’s meal times and nap times, the consistently good attendance shows the commitment of our families to stay Christ-centered.

We have been continuing through our series in the John Barnett book, Word Filled Families: Walk in Truth. Each week we look at a new chapter of the book and are particularly concerned with exploring the biblical principles behind the lessons taught. So far, the book has been greatly helpful and encouraging. Some of the topics covered include the importance of staying Word-filled, marks of a strong godly husband, and God’s estimation of a beautiful woman. A memory verse accompanies each lesson and periodically we have quizzes for accountability (which everyone looks forward to with great anticipation!).

For the month of November, Grace Life also enjoyed an informal “Night on the Town” event. After taking signups, we grouped up our members to enjoy a fun date night over dinner or dessert. In order to facilitate participation, we also helped coordinate childcare (thanks to the Care Ministry!). Our group decided to have dessert together at Leucadia Pizzeria. We ordered four desserts! While we love our children immensely, it was nice to have an evening to spend together with adults!

Grace Life is looking forward to a great rest of the year. We’re off to a great start and are hoping that it will continue to the end. One of our goals this year is to have our first Grace Life retreat. We know that will take a lot of planning and won’t be easy to put together, but hopefully with prayer God will allow us to do that this year. Another upcoming Grace Life event is the annual Christmas party in December. That should be fun time for all the families, including the kids! In the meantime, we will keep doing much of what we have been – providing opportunities for the families of Grace Life to spend time together while also studying and seeking to apply God’s Word.

by Pastor Patrick Cho

Grace Life has been meeting for two weeks now and has just begun a study through Word Filled Families, by John Barnett. Even for the first few weeks, it has been a very helpful book walking through various Scriptures on how to cultivate better marriages and stronger parenting. The importance of having God’s Word central in families can’t be overstated. And yet, for believers we know that this doesn’t happen automatically. It has to be worked at in order for God’s Word to remain the focus in a family.

This principle really goes as far back as when God first revealed His Word to His people. For instance, before the second generation of Israelites is able to enter the Promised Land, Moses helps them to understand what would be the key to their success. In Deuteronomy 6:4-9, he exhorts them to remember their one true God and to keep His Word. The Word was to be on their hearts from early morning until late at night. It needed to proceed from their lips, and in whatever they did or conceived, everything should have been filtered through God’s truth. Even when Moses died, it is not surprising that God told Joshua essentially the same thing before Joshua led the people into the Promised Land (Josh. 1:6-8). If Joshua and the people were going to see any success, the Scriptures needed to be central to their lives.

This is not just an Old Testament idea, though. The Apostle Peter exhorted his readers to long for the pure spiritual milk of the Word in order to grow spiritually (1 Pet. 2:2). If any spiritual growth is going to take place in a believer’s heart, it will come by means of the Bible. This is also why Paul tells the Colossians that they must allow the Word of Christ to dwell in them richly (Col. 3:16). God’s truth is to saturate the lives of His people. It is thus not just a goal for the believing family to be Word filled, but it really is the goal of each believer to be Word filled. And as each believer allows the Word to dwell in them richly, so families will consequently benefit greatly.

This isn’t like the old saying, “An apple a day keeps the doctor away.” Simply knowing the Bible and reading it each day is not going to make a person Word filled. It isn’t just a matter of going through the motions. As one of my beloved seminary professors used to say, “The goal is not just to the Word, but the God of the Word.” We need to pursue Christ, not just knowledge about Christ. This really begins, then, with a complete and correct understanding of the gospel. Unless God has transformed you and renewed your mind to think His thoughts after Him, and unless He has removed your spiritual blindness to allow you to understand His truth, pursuing a Word filled life would be futile. No person can accomplish this on his own, but is completely dependent on God in it (cf. John 15:5; 1 Cor. 2:14).

So, it should be an exciting year as we tackle some of the most important biblical principles pertaining to biblical marriage, parenting, manhood, and womanhood. Our hope is that as a result of this study, the church would be further strengthened and that the families of the church would know the Lord more deeply and sweetly.

by Pastor Patrick Cho

Being a parent of a three-year-old girl is one of the greatest joys of my life. At one point, I only wanted to have boys, but now I would be perfectly content only having girls. There is something irreplaceably sweet about the father/daughter relationship and I cherish it and praise God that I can enjoy it as a dad.

As sweet as having a daughter is, it still is obviously not always easy. At three, our little girl has developed quite a personality and oftentimes battles with Mom and Dad over who is in charge. She admits her dependence on us less, and insists on doing things on her own more. Still, she is a bit clumsy so whenever she wants to do things on her own, it results in more and more messes. At times she gets herself into trouble because she tries things that are too big for her, but there are also times when she is blatantly rebellious and disobedient.

One time, she insisted on using a “big girl” cup because she did not want to drink her milk from a straw. Reluctantly I agreed and instructed her to be very careful because she could spill the milk if she tipped the cup too far. And as most parents who have been in this situation have discovered, that spilled milk was inevitable.

I have heard that patience is a virtue. I have also heard that one should not pray for patience because God will only make you wait for it. It is certainly vastly more important to see what the Bible says about patience, and it is important always to remember and turn to what the Bible says instead of human wisdom. Scripture teaches that patience is a fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22), and so as a believer it should be a mark of who I am. Instead of putting on a sinful attitude, I am called to put on patience amongst other things (Col. 3:12). Paul told Timothy to preach the Word with patience, so I know when I teach my little girl the truths of Scripture it will likewise require patience (cf. 2 Tim. 4:2).

When you study patience in Scripture, you come to realize that God shows us incredible patience as sinners. Speaking out against condemning the sins of others, Paul writes in Romans 2:4, “Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?” The Apostle refers to himself as the foremost of all sinners, but explains that this was so that Jesus could demonstrate His perfect patience to him as an example (1 Tim. 1:15-16). The fact is when I mess up, God is patient with me. He was patient in enduring all my wickedness for the first twenty something years of my unbelieving life, and He continues to show His perfect patience with me even now as a believer.

This really helps to put things into perspective when I struggle to be patient with Eden. She is only three and has a sweet demeanor and oftentimes loves to make Papa happy. During the times when it is more difficult and her sinful heart shows itself, I can remember to be patient as God has been patient to me. I have been shown tremendous patience, so I should not raise my daughter as if I had not been shown any. Of course it is easier to know this in principle than to put it into practice, but being reminded again and again of the principle is part of the growing process that hopefully will lead to greater faithfulness in the practice.